Sticks and Stones
AJ is in a stage right now wherein words are hard for him to find, especially nice ones. So, when he is angry or frustrated he resorts to ones that he has heard and/or picked up from friends or television (his favorites are from Shrek). Words like stupid, idiot, and my favorite? Second! Yes, its one of his favorite AJ expletives.
Our response is not the old soap routine that our parents loved to use on us, or even time outs. Most of the time when AJ gets to the point that he is screaming at me that I am stupid he is also kicking and throwing things so calming him is in my best interest, lest I be injured in the process. We have, since he came home, used Holding Time to calm him and to keep all of us safe. In this case, it provides us a way to both calm him and to give us a chance to reflect on what he should be saying instead.
What works for you?
Tags: , Adoption, CPI Hold, Holding-Time, safe, swearingRelated Stories
POSTED IN: AJ, Attachment, Medical, My Family, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Sensory Integration
1 opinion for Sticks and Stones
BMS
Mar 8, 2008 at 4:55 pm
If my kids say something truly hateful, to me or each other, they get a time out. THey can come out when they apologize. If that takes 20 minutes, so be it. Having done this for years, it rarely takes more that a slightly raised voice on my part to shut down any name calling.
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