It Scares Me
Yesterday AJ and I had an episode at the library that actually, for the first time, scared me. Sure, I have dealt with his aggression and his anger all before but this time I almost drove him straight to the doctor because I did not know how to handle him.
He got upset because I would not allow him to keep the key to the bathroom (they have a key to let you into the bathroom, not sure why but they do). I quietly asked him to give it back and explained that it was not his to keep or play with…that other people had to be able to use the bathroom but he was determined to play with it. It was going to be his. I again told him that I was sorry…that he was going to have to give it back.
Now, brace yourselves because this is where it gets a little scary.
After I placed the key onto the counter he turned to me and hit me in the gut, something I knew was coming so I grabbed his hands. He then kicked me, immediately screamed at the TOP of his lungs (remember, library?), and turned to climb the counter to get to the key. I gently pulled him down and he tried to head butt me and then turned and ran. He found the entrance to behind the counter and tried to get in but I stopped him, turned him around (again, kicking and screaming, kitting, headbutting, etc) and sat him down. Actually, I attempted to sit him down. Most of the time I can sit him in a time out and talk to him but this time he was far beyond anything I had EVER seen.
He got up again, kicked me, again, and ran to the counter, screaming. This is when I picked him up under my arms restraining him as best I could (purse is where? Oh yeah…grab that too) and walked out the door…nope. He decides to throw his glasses.
I stop.
He struggles and grabs my HMMM HAAA. A nice lady picks up the glasses and hands them to me, along with his hat. Gloves are gone.
I then hike up a hundred steps with a screaming five year old restrained under my arms.
Because he wanted to play with a potty key?
Now, the words certainly don’t do the violence and the aggression justice but I think you get my point…what the heck am I supposed to do here? And how am I supposed to deal with this when the Bebe comes home? We have not seen behaviors like this until now, at least not to this extent and It Scares Me.
BTW, I am calling the doctor today.
Tags: aggression, fasd, MedicalRelated Stories
POSTED IN: AJ, Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, Medical, My Family, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
10 opinions for It Scares Me
Carissa
Mar 13, 2008 at 8:49 pm
I hope this is figured out soon!
Dan from NJ
Mar 13, 2008 at 9:35 pm
Poor Marcie. I feel bad for you. I hope your doc can help figure this out soon for your sake. I know there is little I can do, but let me know if the smallest thing would help.
Lynn
Mar 13, 2008 at 10:20 pm
Marcie, Sorry to hear about AJ’s aggression . Maybe the Dr. can give you some help.
Marcie
Mar 13, 2008 at 11:33 pm
Dan, don’t feel bad.
Mom. Thanks. I’m calling the neuro.
LisaC
Mar 14, 2008 at 7:04 pm
WOW!!! That is just about all I can say. WOW!! I know that at school we have people who are working with kids who have violent outbursts trained in what is known as “non-violent crisis intervention”. This involves training on how to restrain a child in such a situtation so that he is not hurt and so that you are not hurt while restraining him. (or her.) It also involves training on what to say and what not to say so the situation can be brought under control as soon as possible. We have a little guy now who has to have this restraint now and again, and I often wonder what is going to happen when he is bigger or the same size as his aid. I am sure this must be part of what is on your mind. (FAS kid, by the way. Not adopted.) I was glad as I was reading that you didn’t mention feeling bad about disrupting the library. They can get over it! Maybe they will reconsider their wierd potty key rule?? :)
Overwhelmed With Joy!
Mar 17, 2008 at 12:47 pm
I’m really sorry that you and AJ had to experience this. I hope the doctor can shed some light on all of this and offer you coping mechanisms. Do you have any training (like the kind LisaC describes) offered to you?
Marcie
Mar 20, 2008 at 9:44 am
Doctor is today. I will fill you all in!
Marcie
Mar 20, 2008 at 9:44 am
And yes, I do have some training on that.
Dan
Mar 22, 2008 at 1:27 pm
Any word on what’s going on here?
Kristine
Apr 2, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Wow, I can so relate. Similar experience two months ago with our son while visiting the Franklin Institute. Fortunately my husband was with us, b/c I was carrying the baby at the time. It is scary! And we worry about what to do when Noah is bigger, he’s very strong and restraining him is difficult enough now. I so wish I could get past the embarassment of these episodes. I try to ignore the stares from other people, but it is so hard.
Please share any solutions you come up with!
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